A Joke

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A man is sitting in the bar having a drink when an asian guy sits down next to him and has a drink.

The guy says, so you're asian, do you know karate?
asian guy says no, guy says tae kwan do, asian guy says no, guys says judo, asian says you know, just cause im asian doesn't mean i know martial art.

guy says so you don't know any fighting at all.

asian guy for the last time NO!

guy says good, cause you're drinking my f@cking beer

 

[rich_ace_G]

Walks Into a Bar... Monkey Eats Everything


A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink, and while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all over the place, eating everything behind the bar. Then the monkey jumps on to the pool table and swallows a billiard ball.

The bartender screams at the guy, "Your monkey just ate the cue ball off my pool table -- whole!"

"Sorry," replied the guy. "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. I'll pay for everything."

The man finishes his drink, pays and leaves.

Two weeks later, he's in the bar with his pet monkey, again. He orders a drink, and the monkey starts running around the bar. The monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his ass, pulls it out and eats it.

The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks.

"Yeah," replies the guy. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures stuff first."

 

[LURE]

Our secretary at work looks so good with nice make ups and lipstick ... on our breaktime I told one employee what those make ups and lipsticks are made up of (animal fats extracts, other fluids, mixtures of different insects powdered). Secretary passed by and heared everything, she quickly run to the washroom, washed her face and never seen her with any make up or lipstick after that. :razz: